I was admitted for routine induction at 6am August 14th 2018. All day long Willow was perfectly fine. In the early dark hours of August 15th 2018 our world fell apart, our beautiful, healthy, precious baby girl Willow had grown Her Angel Wings.

Willow had her whole life ahead of her but she was taken from us through no fault of our own. At 14:33 on August 15th 2018 Willow was born sleeping .

I miss those days when I thought nothing bad could happen to me or my family. Becoming pregnant after so many years was an exciting time for us as a family. Every day brought promise, hope and excitment for the future. I like many others always thought that becoming pregnant would guarantee a happy ending, but in our case our world fell apart.

Everything was not okay, we didn’t get our happy ending. In fact I couldn’t have imagined the devastating loss and heartbreaking pain I’ve felt since that night, that my sweet perfect Baby Willow’s heart stopped beating. There’s no going back to the innocent days full of blind hope and faith. There’s no everything will be okay. There’s none of that because my Baby Girl Willow is lost. Lost forever.

I wish my family and I were not in this situation and didn’t have to receive the help and support from Féileacáin. Without this amazing organisation we would not have been able to bring our beautiful baby girl Willow home. They provided us with a Cuddle Cot in the hospital and at home. We left the hospital on August 21st, the cuddle cot enabled us to keep Willow with us for a futher 3 nights and 4 days until her funeral. I now cling to my little bear that matches Willow’s and to her Memory Box. It provides some comfort to have these little pieces to hold onto in the very dark and lonely times.

Coming home to an empty nursery and packing away her things was heartbreaking. Looking at all her toys that she would never play with and the clothes she would never wear breaks my heart. However, I’m glad that myself, my husband and my children can keep her memory alive by organising this wonderful Annual event in her honour, and to help raise awarness and funds for this Non-Profit organisation Féileacáin.

In Memory of Baby Willow Clarke

Created by Pamela Clarke

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